So, how's your 2010 so far? Mine is chugging right along!
When I think of the new year,
<----- this is the image that pops into my head. The new year has been busy, busy, busy!
I feel like I'm a passenger on a train and life is whizzing by the windows, and the train is carrying me along, like it or not!
I got a new job at church -- after 10-plus years of working with children and their leaders in Primary, I'm now in the women's organization (RS). Talk about a mind shift! I've been scrambling to learn the new duties, but I finally feel like I'm starting to get the hang of it now.
In spite of many calls and interview opportunities in the past couple of months, nothing has really panned out, and it's time to make hard decisions. I'm pretty good at making things stretch, (almost to a magical level, I was told...LOL) but it can't go on forever. Resources dwindle down, even with the tightest budgets.
Our plan of having me go to school, and then jump into a career of my choice once the Sweet Girl's flown the nest, has changed. It's time to enter the workforce now and help out the family. I am more than willing to roll up my sleeves and do what needs to be done, but privately, quietly, deep down in my soul, there is heartbreak over this. I don't want to give up any part of my labor of love. I could write a post all by itself on this, but I won't. Just know that words like "infertility", "you'll never have children", "you're expecting!", "I only have one", and "Mr. H, being able to be a mother is a gift to me from heaven", and "I don't want to miss a *minute* of this!" ... are involved. Enough said.
So, I tuck these feelings away and give myself a good talking to -- I'm trying to be positive and proactive and see what's around the bend for me. The challenge will be to see if I can trust in the Lord's will, and be open to this journey -- and stop checking my ticket to see if I got on the wrong train!
I've found out by experience that when you do what's right, good things happen. Even when it's hard. I have to believe that good things are just around the bend...
Wish me luck.